The Miracle Story Of Our Little DC

            

        Four years ago, when he was just four months old, my little DC was diagnosed with vesicoureteral reflux or VUR. Vesico-uretic reflux (VUR) occurs when the valve between the ureters and the bladder is not working properly. Urine can flow backwards into the ureters, sometimes as far as the kidneys. If infected urine flows into the kidneys, this can damage them. There are 5 grades of VUR reflux and my son was diagnosed with grade 5, the most severe.

                Each month we had to rush him to the Emergency Room because he was having high fever, chills and turning blue. We always hoped for good news, but it seemed like we never heard any. The doctors told us that high grade reflux, especially grade 5, rarely resolved on its own despite years of observation and treatment. We were told to prepare ourselves both emotionally and financially for the very real possibility that our son would need to undergo major surgery at the age of 3. They also told us that if his condition worsens and surgery won’t work, he may eventually require a kidney transplant. The news was devastating. At an age when most children were excited about starting school, my son would be waiting for a kidney donor to appear so that he could live.

                Every day for the first four years of his life, he has had to take prophylactic antibiotics in order to avoid urinary tract infections and renal scarring. Each year he was exposed to all different types of machines that emit radiation, such as ultrasound scans and voiding cystourethograms (VCUG). He even had to have a circumcision in order to clear the passage to his urethra.

                We prayed every night. We went from church to church and pleaded with God through the intercession of Mama Mary (Our Lady of Manaoag) to please cure our precious little boy. Sometimes I would feel like maybe he was cured already because to look at him he appeared so healthy, but it was never the case.

                And then August 22 came, a date that is forever burned in our memories as the most special day of the year, because on that day the doctors announced that our precious baby’s VUR had been downgraded from grade 5 to grade 1 and he would no longer be required to take the antibiotics. My tears of joy are overflowing. There are not enough words on earth that can express the sincere gratitude I feel towards all of his doctors – Dr. Bisnar, a truly phenomenal urosurgeon, Dr. Canonigo the best pediatric nephrologist, and last but certainly not least I also express my gratitude to Dr. Bolong, his fantastic pediatric urologist.

                For four years I prayed for a miracle. Even in the depths of despair I never gave up hope. Some people shrug miracles off as being merely coincidence or hopeless fantasy, but every time I see my son laughing and playing I am reminded of just how real they are. 

3 Reasons It Is OK To Homeschool (or Unschool) Your Teenager

School break season is over and children are heading back to school. While many children are excited about getting back into the classroom, there are many others whose stomachs are filled with dread at the thought. The transition from grade school to high school can leave some teenagers feeling overwhelmed or unhappy. The social hierarchy of high school has students dealing with the formations of cliques, bullies, and social pressure to fit in which can lead your once happy learner to become sullen and feeling lackluster about school. If your teenager has fallen out of love with school, there are other learning options available. Allowing your child to learn at home in his own way and at his own pace may sound scary when you have always followed the rules of structured learning, but many teenagers who are struggling in school become happy and find a renewed vigor for learning once they are able to learn in a home environment that they are comfortable in. If the thought of letting your child learn at home has you feeling a bit wary, consider these facts:

Children Who Are Unschooled Do Go To College

            

It is a myth that only those with a high school diploma can go to college. Millions of homeschooled kids have attended college locally and even in Ivy League colleges in the States. In fact, many homeschooled/unschooled kids enroll in college as early as when they are sixteen. While they may sometimes have to go through more loopholes than traditionally schooled kids, the fact of the matter is that anything that can be done with a high school diploma can also be done without one. Many unschooled adults hold a college degree, and not because their parents forced them to go to college, but because they themselves wanted to go.

Many Unschooled Children Grow Up to Have Strong Leadership Skills

            

In a structured school setting, much emphasis is put on learning academics, but there is no focus on teaching time management and self-motivation. The students do what they are supposed to do when they are supposed to do it because a teacher or a parent tells them that they have to. But children who learn outside of the structured school environment have the responsibility put solely on their shoulders. If they want to become a doctor one day, then they have to take the initiative to focus their time and energy performing tasks and learning skills that will get them there, without anyone standing behind them telling them that they have to. For this reason unschooled children do better when they go off to college than many traditionally schooled children simply because while all that freedom and responsibility is new to traditionally schooled children, there are skills that unschooled children have already mastered. The early development of these skills leads unschooled children to grow up to be highly motivated, self-driven, and responsible adults, who in turn make great leaders.

Unschooled Children Are Sociable

            

There is a bit of a stigma surrounding untraditionally schooled children that leads people to falsely believe that they are “weird” or socially awkward. This could not be further from the truth. Children who are schooled in a home environment participate in sports, church, and community activities just like traditionally schooled children. If anything, unschooled children are often better socialized than their traditional counterparts because instead of doing the majority of their socializing solely with children their own age, unschooled children socialize with children and adults of all ages, which better prepares them for having to deal with people of all ages once they reach adulthood.

            

If your child is struggling to learn or fit in at school, then consider letting him start this school year by learning at home in his own way. Keep in mind that school is one place where children can learn and grow, but it is not the only place. Instead of dreading the school year, you and your teenager could be excitedly imagining new possibilities. If you need more information, there's this book entitled Homeschooling: The Teen Years which you may download in Kindle at $14.00. This book reveals secrets on how to make homeschooling work for you and your teen, plus, it has inspiring stories from real homeschooling families. 

Watch this Heart-Wrenching Video and Help Save Babies with Patau Syndrome

Here's a very heart-wrenching moment of parents with their precious child. The couple who knew that their unborn child was not developing properly documented their own journey. Watching it made me realize the most painful experience a parent could have.

 

                                                          Credits: Dallas Morning News via YouTube

Support

Sadly, many of the children with Patau Syndrome do not reach their first birthday. Let us support and help raise awareness and funds to families with children with Patau Syndrome. Go to www.trisomy.org for more information on how to help and donate.

 Patau Syndrome, also called Trisomy 13 syndrome is a disorder of human chromosomes which occurs in approximately 1 in 10,000 live born infants. Trisomy refers to three copies of a chromosome instead of the normal two and in Trisomy 13 there is the presence of an extra #13 chromosome. Approximately 80% of infants with Trisomy 13 syndrome will have a full trisomy (affecting all cells) while the remainder will have a trisomy due to a rearrangement of cells called a translocation (an attachment of all or part of one chromosome to another chromosome) or have mosaicism (two different cell lines in an individual such as normal cells and trisomy cells).
Infants born with Trisomy 13 have a recognizable pattern of physical features that often allows the health professional to make the diagnosis of the syndrome. (Genetic testing must be done to confirm diagnosis.) Notable physical birth defects and, sometimes, anatomic changes of internal organs are present. Findings of significance include small head size (microcephaly); small eyes (microphthalmia) or sometimes an absent eye or faulty development of the retina. Cleft lip or cleft palate or both occur in about 60% of children. In addition, there are a number of less medically significant physical findings that are helpful in diagnosis. These include variations of ear shape, changes on the palm of the hand, and extra fingers and toes. Changes in foot development, including changes to the heel, the so-called rocker bottom foot, can occur.

Source of information: John C. Carey, MD, MPH, Medical Advisor for SOFT
Professor of Pediatrics and Genetics, University of Utah
Copyright 2012
Support Organization for Trisomy 18, 13 and Related Disorders
2982 South Union St. Rochester, NY 14624 800-716-7638
www.trisomy.org

Homeschooling Conference 2014

I and my husband just attended Educating For Life Homeschooling Conference last September 6 in Bayanihan Center and I was amazed by numerous people that are so passionate about home schooling.  The conference was organized by Unilab, TheLearning Basket, Manila Workshops and supported by HAPI or the Homeschool Association of thePhilippine Island.

Keynote speaker Irma Chua, who is a mom of six, shared her experience doing homeschooling in the Philippines for about 20 years. Haven’t you realized it yet? Home education is a lifestyle! It is the learning and bonding process that makes our family experience worth dying for togetherJ. 

Big Daddy Jake, Dennis Poliquit, also shared his experience being a homeschooling dad of his two twins. My favorite mommy blogger Tina Rodriguez of Truly Rich Mom shared her wisdom too! 

Formal Homeschooling in the Future

Honestly, I am more on “unschooling” Little DC right now. We do not  have a homeschool provider and we don't follow a formal curriculum. All our activities are play-based and based on my son's interest. I am not an expert and even after the conference, I still have a lot of questions in mind. 

My only problem with formal homeschooling is the formal curriculum and my problem with the formal curriculum is “irrelevance”. There are a lot of topics that I have to teach which for me is not needed for my son’s future. Please correct me if i'm wrong but if I continue with unschooling method and only teach based on my son’s interest, he won’t get any diploma right? I have this kind of dilemma and I still need more time to ponder and evaluate what I need to teach my son.  

Parents should learn to explore viable options for their kids. It may be scary at first, but, all it takes to homeschool (I think) is just time management and PASSION (and may I add Patience! A lot of it!). I truly believe that it is something to keep and develop here in the Philippines, especially now that sending a child to school is getting more expensive.

The event is very inspiring but I wish DepEd would have participated by giving us insights on how to properly organize our home education sessions. (Or maybe DepEd was there but i didn't pay attention coz i was busy shopping books and cds at The Learning Basket?  haha!) 

Parents need a very detailed or a technical guide about home education. Being a newbie, I sometimes find it frustrating to go reading from blog to blog just to search the instructions from DepEd. These questions still remain in my mind

1.   Where do we get the instructions online that come from DepEd?

2.   Where can we get a cheaper resource or materials?

3.   How do we get a good “customized” curriculum that won’t put us in a dilemma later on when we enroll our kids to college?

4.   If I choose to homeschool independently, where can I get the right support? What I mean by this is communicating with the right authority here in the Philippines, not just forums where interpretation totally differs at times.

For me, homeschooling is not a matter of trial and error. This decision must be taken seriously because it involves the lives and future of our children. When you decide to homeschool, you must be passionate about it. It is a decision which requires your commitment to continue your purpose with confidence. Good thing that the speakers were so good in helping us understand what homeschooling is all about.

P.S. We are trying to raise good children who will be the future of our country. Why is it that home education is not getting as much support as the private schools? What do we need to do to set up this system? I need your thoughts teacher mommies. Until we meet again in the next conference!

Before Five In A Row

I am a very relaxed teacher mommy. I homeschool (unschool) Little DC everyday in "petiks-mode". Right now I only depend on his time. Everything that we do is learning to him. We do not rely on a structured curriculum or a planned activity. We learn through play, but I always make it a point to read and sing to him every morning and evening. I refuse to call that a structure but a religious routine ever since he was inside my tummy. I am happy that Little DC loves books and learning for him has always been filled with excitement and enthusiasm. Right now we are using Before Five In A Row (BFIAR) books bought from Rainbow Resource for our daily reading ritual. As much as possible, we try to associate or connect our activities that day with the book. My style is, we do not plan the activities out or as written in the BFIAR curriculum, we just go with the flow based on my son's interest that day and try to connect its relevance to the book. So happy that Little DC loves his BFIAR books already. Sometimes he would ask me to read 5 different books in a day. 

I Teach My Son the Other Way – Talk to Strangers

I know you must be wondering why I let my Little DC talk to strangers. Not talking to people you don’t know is not all about safety. It is about how you can teach your child about communicating politely with others and using common sense when there is danger or not. How could my child learn how to prevent danger when he himself cannot tell danger from ordinary events?

(Photo Credit: http://www.narrativecommunications.com/)

Trusting my son’s perceptions

Not all strangers are bad. Who else will they turn to if they're lost and need help and there's no policeman around? Teaching our children when it's appropriate to talk to strangers and when it's not, could make our children more confident in discriminating bad people in the society. This keeps him safer rather than not knowing at all anything about how the mind of strangers who are bad work. Seriously, if you observe your child, they tend to do what they think they should do and not what you say they should do. We should not argue with what they think is right. I always let experience provide the lesson. We cannot over rule their judgment. We are here to guide without making them feel inconvenient.

 Photo Credit: Julia Passamani http://www.chicagonow.com/

Talking to strangers doesn't mean he should go with the stranger

Little DC’s communication and comprehension skills made him smart and confident in expressing what he feels about other people and towards any event. 

Here are some of our advice to him:

Photo Credit: Diane http://hotdiggetyblog.com/parenting-tip-what-is-the-secret-word/

• There's no big guy or girl who would ask for a toddler's help except me and daddy, so never give help to big guys and girls you don't know. 

• You can talk to people you don't know but never go with them. 

• Run if somebody offers you candies, lollipops, popcorn, sandwich, hotdog, balloons, toys and anything from people you don't know 

• If you are lost, look for a policeman or manong guard. If there are no people in uniform around, look for a lola or a lady who has a child and ask them. 

There is a big difference in the sequence of events. If you are talking about safety, I am confident Little DC could say "no" politely (or maybe rudely). If he is being forced to go with a stranger, then he should make a scene at once to catch the attention of the other adults around. We are actually role playing and practicing shouting "HELP!!!" inside the house already.

Learning how the world behaves

Teaching how to differentiate between threatening situations and how to respond to it makes more sense than not to let them talk with strangers. Evaluating based on instincts could make them safer than just not talking at all. Children are compliant by nature, but I do not want Little DC to lose common sense. I would feel better if I can raise a child who fights than raise a meek one whom the world can abuse later. Every day life is a fight and Little DC is on it. He is strong and getting smarter each day. This is one good way to develop logical and analytical thinking skills – talk to strangers!

What moms think about themselves vs. What their kids think.

This awesome video by Elevation Church has a group of mothers talk about how they think they're doing as moms and their shortcomings as parents. Then they get to find out exactly what their kids think of them as mothers. 

Okay mommies, make sure you grab some tissues before you watch this. 

(video from http://www.wimp.com/momskids/)