I Teach My Son the Other Way – Talk to Strangers

I know you must be wondering why I let my Little DC talk to strangers. Not talking to people you don’t know is not all about safety. It is about how you can teach your child about communicating politely with others and using common sense when there is danger or not. How could my child learn how to prevent danger when he himself cannot tell danger from ordinary events?

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Trusting my son’s perceptions

Not all strangers are bad. Who else will they turn to if they're lost and need help and there's no policeman around? Teaching our children when it's appropriate to talk to strangers and when it's not, could make our children more confident in discriminating bad people in the society. This keeps him safer rather than not knowing at all anything about how the mind of strangers who are bad work. Seriously, if you observe your child, they tend to do what they think they should do and not what you say they should do. We should not argue with what they think is right. I always let experience provide the lesson. We cannot over rule their judgment. We are here to guide without making them feel inconvenient.

 Photo Credit: Julia Passamani http://www.chicagonow.com/

Talking to strangers doesn't mean he should go with the stranger

Little DC’s communication and comprehension skills made him smart and confident in expressing what he feels about other people and towards any event. 

Here are some of our advice to him:

Photo Credit: Diane http://hotdiggetyblog.com/parenting-tip-what-is-the-secret-word/

• There's no big guy or girl who would ask for a toddler's help except me and daddy, so never give help to big guys and girls you don't know. 

• You can talk to people you don't know but never go with them. 

• Run if somebody offers you candies, lollipops, popcorn, sandwich, hotdog, balloons, toys and anything from people you don't know 

• If you are lost, look for a policeman or manong guard. If there are no people in uniform around, look for a lola or a lady who has a child and ask them. 

There is a big difference in the sequence of events. If you are talking about safety, I am confident Little DC could say "no" politely (or maybe rudely). If he is being forced to go with a stranger, then he should make a scene at once to catch the attention of the other adults around. We are actually role playing and practicing shouting "HELP!!!" inside the house already.

Learning how the world behaves

Teaching how to differentiate between threatening situations and how to respond to it makes more sense than not to let them talk with strangers. Evaluating based on instincts could make them safer than just not talking at all. Children are compliant by nature, but I do not want Little DC to lose common sense. I would feel better if I can raise a child who fights than raise a meek one whom the world can abuse later. Every day life is a fight and Little DC is on it. He is strong and getting smarter each day. This is one good way to develop logical and analytical thinking skills – talk to strangers!